Exam stress: I miss my pony

I wanted to lie under a tree today and stare at the sky forever

“All my life, I have been in love with the sky. Even when everything was falling apart around me, the sky was always there for me.” –  Yoko Ono


I had my fourth exam this afternoon. It was a really tough, gritty exam which squeezed every last ounce of power from my brain. I tried my hardest and that is all I can do.

Yesterday I sat and revised all day, didn’t leave the house.  I thought I had better do something physical, so I did the workout on Miranda Hart’s Maracattack.  It was hilarious and cheered me up no end.

I didn’t really sleep last night. I suppose part of it is stress, and a part of it is having done nothing but sit.  My brain is constantly trying to remember and take in information that when I do finally lie back and close my eyes,  a million thoughts and images rush through my head at lightening speed, trying to get out.  They’ve been there all day but I’ve been too focused on revision to allow them to be heard.

It’s this sort of time when, while I was doing my A-levels, I would say OK, I’ve done enough revision for today.  It’s time to chill. I would go to the yard and spend hours with Oscar, grooming him, chatting to him, feeding him polos.  Then my friend would arrive and we would go for a hack together, talking about everything and nothing.  I’d make Oscar’s bed up for him, give him his tea, fill a big haynet and put him to bed all snuggly in his rug.  And then I had relaxed, I could go home and carry on, and have a good nights sleep.

But this time it’s relentless revision. Mum and dad are coming to see me this weekend, to take away everything that I don’t need for this week.  I have three exams next week and then that’s it.  I can leave these exams, this house which should have been fun, but four opinionated girls living under one roof was always going to be tricky.  I can go back home to my Bramble dog, my family and my Sheryl, before I start the next adventure in July.

That’s an exciting adventure.

And I cannot wait.


An old photo – me and my boy, Oscar.



3 thoughts on “Exam stress: I miss my pony

  1. It’s this time of year that I miss riding most too. Never had my own horse but I could always visit Japser (my favourite riding school pony EVER) and he would cheer me up no end. Good luck with the rest of the exams Maddi!

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